Quarantine Reflections: Talkative Tina, A Poem by Gayatri R. Shah

TALKATIVE TINA

It had been a trying day for Talkative Tina

After downing quite a few tequilas

She had Zoomed and Skyped and House Partied for hours

Now her throat was hoarse, her mood sour

You see multiple issues were causing her stress

As far as she was concerned life was a mess

For one, the hairdresser couldn’t come in these days of lockdown

Which meant the honey brown blonde cresses were receding from her crown  

Shopping for clothes and shoes had all but stopped

Since Gucci and Jimmy Choo deliveries were blocked

Her building society’s Covid-19 Committee

Had decided that receiving such packages was just way too risky

When she asked them why heels and dresses weren’t in the essential items list

They appeared surprisingly miffed

      

“Ms Tina please understand there is a crisis going on” they explained

Thinking that this reasoning may compel some restraint

But Talkative Tina couldn’t put herself in their BATA shoes

She was least fussed about the news

Nowadays she had bigger issues to worry about

Her fabulous life couldn’t be captured on her Instagram account

She missed those gazillion friends she met just for photos

In the old days they would line up together, their arms on their torsos  

      

She missed those carefree days of party hopping,

Her nails done, her clothes tight, ready for people spotting

Nowadays she had just her mobile to roam

And a husband to avoid in their gigantic home

Some pesky children to dodge and live-in staff to trouble

These days of self-isolation really were such a struggle

Even with five daily Quarantinis it was all such a drag

She has no way to debut her new Chanel handbag

This Coronavirus was hardship personified

For someone used to being a social butterfly

And to make matters worse her curves were disappearing

Because she was snacking on junk food and overeating

Indeed, hardship was the life of Talkative Tina

For it took a global pandemic to domesticate this diva